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Katie [userpic]

I want to move to Heaven

October 7th, 2009 (12:45 pm)
complacent

current mood: complacent
current song: Njiqahdda-Silvaan Morta Aask Ell

I do not want to think about how lonely I am. I do not want to think about how I will always be alone. I do not want to think about how I will never find my way home (wherever that is.) I do not want to think about going to work.

The Damned are playing in Salt Lake City. Do you think I will go? Hell no. I do not want to be around the people. The stench of people. The absolute abhorrence I feel for people right now. How can I care so much for people, and hate them at the same time? I have not gone out for months. I have not seen anyone.

I have not been getting adequate sleep lately. The most I can sleep is six hours, then I have to drive an hour and a half to a shitty job. SOMETHING NEEDS TO CHANGE.

Nothing ever does though. I think I tolerate shit because I am so lazy. I do  not want to deal with things.

I wish suicide was a simple action and completely painless. But you have to try for what you really want, right? I hate it when people say I am so negative and if I just changed this or that, that I would be happy. I have a mental illness you ignorant assholes.

I am in the worst mood. I have been for a few days now. I am not sure exactly why. My mental illness? My family? My living situation? Utah? The dillusions of being happy? The dillusion of really finding love?

Katie [userpic]

4:16

September 23rd, 2009 (04:16 am)

so, after reading my past posts i have come to the conclusion that i am a pretty negative person. this negativity has got to have had some impact on my life. or, maybe i just tell things like they are with no veil to disguise the ugliness.

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

September 9th, 2009 (01:28 pm)

man, i am so pissed! when it comes to tattoos it is good to be a perfectionist right? well anyways, i had some tattoos gone over about a week ago and they still look fucked up to me! it makes me really, really mad. man, but i found someone else. i want her to do my tattoos and i saw her portfolio and her artwork is amazing. god damn it! i am so upset i feel like i will not ever be able to sleep.

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

August 1st, 2009 (11:48 pm)

i will never trust anyone

Katie [userpic]

p.s

July 30th, 2009 (04:48 am)

if anyone out there in internet world wants to read more entries just add me as a friend. i am sure no one will, but whatever.

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

July 29th, 2009 (07:19 pm)

Why would someone put something online and not expect others to read it?

Katie [userpic]

take the fur out of furniture

June 13th, 2009 (02:07 am)

life

been so busy do not have time for anything else

have been a hermit

not sure if i am happy or not

probably not

my dog eats too much

it rains everyday

work blows

wish i had more direction, ambition, motivation

have a boyfriend

sometimes wish i did not

haha

hd vision wrap arounds?

america's funniest home videos is fucking evil

life has no point

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

August 13th, 2008 (12:47 pm)

 
THIS JOURNAL IS FOR FRIENDS ONLY YOU FUCKING BITCH

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

August 24th, 2006 (06:40 pm)

fuck you Rozz Williams for killing yourself and taking away the chance for me to ever see you live or hear new music ...what a damn shame.

Katie [userpic]

(no subject)

May 23rd, 2006 (02:49 pm)
calm

current location: Work
current mood: calm
current song: Something from Profane Existence

Women need to feel cherished and men need to feel respected.

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